How Can Couples Plan for Retirement When They Disagree About Money?
You can share a home, raise a family, and spend decades together without seeing money the same way. One person checks the bank balance for reassurance. The other sees money sitting in the bank and wonders what it could be earning.
I see this in retirement planning all the time. The goal is to agree on what your money needs to accomplish and build a plan you both understand and feel comfortable following.
What if one spouse is comfortable with investment risk and the other is not?
Kristin and I have worked with a couple whose views were about as different as you could imagine. He was comfortable taking substantial investment risk. She became upset at the thought of losing any money in the market.
The more we listened, the clearer her concern became. She needed to know she could pay the bills and buy groceries without worrying about what the market was doing. A large account balance alone did not give her that reassurance.
That is why I want to hear from both spouses. Before discussing investments, I want to understand what each person needs to feel secure. Sometimes the most useful question is simply, "What are you afraid could happen?"
How do you build one retirement plan for two different people?
Start with the big numbers. What does it cost to run your household? What do you want to spend on travel, family, and the things you enjoy? What income will you have, and how much will need to come from savings?
For the couple we discussed, accessible savings and a clear monthly income plan helped address her concerns. Their resources also allowed room for investments that reflected his interest in growth. That arrangement fit their circumstances. Another couple might need a different balance.
I do not want either spouse agreeing to a plan just to end the conversation. Both should understand where the money is, how expenses will be covered, and what investment losses could mean for their lifestyle.
What makes a retirement plan work for both spouses?
I often say that everybody has to win. That means listening, making thoughtful compromises, and taking each other's concerns seriously.
A plan needs to support your goals and help you feel comfortable enough to enjoy life. If the numbers look good but one of you lies awake worrying, we still have something to work through.
If you and your spouse could use help starting that conversation, you can reach our team throughLegacyRetirementGroup.com. Sometimes having someone listen to both perspectives helps you find common ground.